Sense and decide
The clearness committee
Ask questions only, give no advice
A small group asks only open questions so one person can think through a hard decision without being handed an answer.
Borrowed from the clearness committee, a practice of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers). Read the original source.
One session · An hour or more to set up · Anyone on the team can start it
Try this first
Fifteen minutes. The person describes their situation and everyone else asks only what and how questions.
Use it when
Someone faces a hard decision and the reflex is to hand them the answer (from a peer or the AI).
Skip it when
It suits a personal decision the person must own, not a group decision or a problem with a right answer. It also needs people who can hold a confidence and resist steering, and without that it does harm.
How to introduce it
Gather a few trusted people around one person facing a difficult choice. One rule: the group may only ask open, honest questions. No advice, no steering, no have-you-considered. The person thinks out loud and the group helps them hear themselves.
How to show up
Protect the no-advice rule, because the urge to suggest is strong. When a question is advice wearing a question mark, catch it and ask for an open one.
How long it takes
Typically forty-five minutes to an hour for one person. The questions-only rule takes a few minutes to set.
What makes it hard
People smuggle advice in as questions, so keep returning them to open ones. Silence after a question is good and should be left alone. The person is thinking, and filling it breaks the work.
What it looks like when it's working
The person reaches their own insight and says something like I think I know what I need to do, arrived at in their own words. A group that ends up telling them what to do did not follow the method.
How long until it sticks
Expect a few sessions before a group is comfortable asking questions and holding back advice, which is the hard discipline.
How you know it stuck
It becomes part of the culture when people offer to ask a colleague some questions instead of jumping to advice.
The idea behind it
The person already holds their answer. The group's job is helping them reach it. A good question opens a door and advice closes it.
Where it comes from
Quaker business method. A questions-only support circle. Beautiful for the AI era, where the reflex is to hand someone the answer. This rebuilds the muscle of thinking it through. A small group helps a person facing a decision by asking questions, not giving advice, so the person finds their own way.
Why it matters for senior teams
Asking for help with a hard decision is hardest for senior leaders, and it matters most when they do it, because the rest of the team follows their lead